Monday, December 19, 2011

The Rage Marines: Giving Destiny The Finger

This is the abridged works of Septerius Anonivious, Chapter Serf and Chronicler of the Mentor Legion, Seconded to the Angry Marines Chapter.
 
As it came to pass, in my second week with the Angry Marines on their home world of Ire, I was summoned into the presence of the Chapter Master himself. I appeared, with some trepidation, as I knew of my predecessor's fate at the hands of the Master's chainfists. Nevertheless, I knew of my duty and appeared at the appointed time.
 
As expected, when I arrived, the otehr attendees appeared to be arguing, in fact it seemed they nearly came to blows at several points during the proceedings. Indeed, that is the usual course of events in an Angry Marine conclave, which caused me to realize that this was some sort of promotion ceremony,and the Master was proceeding with some sort of attempt to not stave in his subordinates helmets.
 
"LISTEN UP YOU BABIES!" the Master began, "I WANT ALL OF YOU TO HEAD TO THE GALACTIC EAST, THAT JERICHO PLACE WHERE THE WHINY GUARD ARE HAVING SO MUCH TROUBLE WITH SISSY SPACE BUGS AND LIMP WRISTED ELVES, AND DON'T COME BACK 'TIL YOU'VE KILLED EVERY SINGLE ONE OF THEM OUT THERE!"
 
To be continued in Part II: The Space Marine Paragraph.
 
This ought to be an adventure. Writing about the Angry Marines (or my sub-chapter, the Rage Marines) while still keeping it pg-13 or lower is a challenge. I guess you don't really need to when dealing with Angries, because well, they're angry. We'll see how this goes. I invented a Chronicler to tell the story so it's not all in caps, like it would be if told by a marine, and it can be a little more civil in tone as well. Stay tuned for part II, coming soon.

No comments: